A New Beginning. . .

Class has officially started already, as the September semester began just 12 hours ago. Wow, can't believe it's been more than a year since I came to ICSJ. I still remember, the first day that I became an INTI student. The first friend I made in college, J.C. The first group of people I hung out with, Naomi, Jean, Sharmini. My first lecturer, Miss Kamala. The first club I joined, Editorial Board. The first college event I went to, Orientation Night of May 2008.

I still remember, the first time that I told anyone my secrets. It was only to those few people, whom I could trust with my life. I could always count on them. I wish I could have more time with them, but life has to go on at some point and we can't be in paradise forever.

The day that I went out with friends for the first time, just for fun, was with all of you. You asked me like a normal person, with no strings attached. Not out of pity, or out of exploition, but just for the fun of hanging out. Something that I haven't experience in a long time. It felt so good, to be a friend and not a victim.

When I was drowning in misery, all of you were there to pull me out of that depth of darkness and into the surface of light. I had completely given up hope in anyone helping out of kindness, until I met all of you. I didn't want to accept it at the time, that there couldn't exist such warmth, such kindness, such sincerity... But it all changed in time. All of you successfully cracked open the shell that I've been hiding under for more than 10 years... just with simple sentences like "What are friends for?", "It's never too late", "Don't give up", "Whenever you need someone, I'm always there for you", "We're brothers aren't we?", "Your closer to me than anyone here *****". I'll never forget those words...

The first working experience I ever felt, was wonderful. The people that I worked with, I couldn't ask for better co-workers. I felt the responsibility, and the feeling of being needed. For once, there wasn't a voice that said I was useless, that I can't help anyone. I loved the feeling of being wanted. It may sound like a selfish reason to help others, but that reason has made it possible for me to be of service to others. I grew so much from the experience. Both from working as a student helper in INTI, and for working inside the Editorial Board. Thank you...

My first birthday, that I celebrated with friends instead of just my family. All of you did it unsuspectingly, that day I thought that you were just being nice and said that you wanted to throw me a party. "That it was just all talk, but still nice of them to mention that", I thought at the time. It caught me by surprise when all of you really did do the party. I felt so accepted by everyone, so appreciated. The warmth that all of you gave me, I'll remember it always.

When I was far away in a different country, feeling down, all of you talked to me online, or sent me an email. We just talked, and it took my mind off of all the sadness that was in me. I didn't feel sad at all when I'm talking to all of you. I felt free, to be who I really was infront of you guys.

So much has happened in a span of a year. Many bonds were made and broken in just a year. Some I wish didn't have to end, and some I am grateful that it continued. I've had to say goodbye to so many good friends, that it makes me grief with such sadness. I can't believe that they're gone, just like that. Some have left for the U.S.A. and some had left INTI to pursue their careers or other studies, while others have completely lost touch with me that we never speak anymore. To those close friends of mine, thank you for all the wonderful memories that we've experienced. Especially to Han Sen, Alexis, Lik Pang, Amos, Sie Hui, Jonathan, Suzanne, Yi Qian and the rest of you guys. You've been the best, and I've had so much fun with all of you. I can't believe that most of you are gone from INTI already, but even if I don't believe that fact, it doesn't change what reality is. I'm happy for you guys, truly.

After this semester, I'll lose even more friends. But I'll still have them for this semester. And I'm happy to be with all of them like Zjen Thak, Naomi, J.C., Jessica, Kiet, Sandy, Vinod, Joel, Daryl, and the rest of those who I haven't mentioned. All of you have touched my life in some way, and I hope that we could spend more days together than what's been given to us. It's a new beginning that I'm afraid what the outcome might be, but I won't know until I move forward.

Thank you everyone for all the memories that I cherished that was made with all of you...